Sex and the City 2
Bet you didn't see this post starting here; an unlikely beginning but its where me and all the girlies got together last night. [Yes I know we're about 2 weeks behind the rest of you but its the only date that suited us all!]
So SATC2 brings us all together, we laugh, we cry, we bawk, we crave and we leave the cinema...
Drink anyone?
We head to our local, pull up on stools and order the obligatory cocktails [mocktail for me - still thinking of the diet!] and of all things start to discuss labour [no not the political party] cause its exactly what you do, drinks in hand when you've just come out of SAT2, isn't it??
Perhaps I should clarify
One of our girlie group has just given birth [5 weeks ago], another is 3 months pregnant and one of the girls announced at the end of the show that she was 8 weeks pregnant ... so the line of conversation isn't to hard to imagine.
Moving to the point
We shock ourselves with weird and cruelly horrible labour stories, drink up and head home. My head hits the pillow and the fun really starts! I start to dream... or perhaps I should say, it starts as a dream and quickly turns to a nightmare...
I'm in labour...
In the dream, now obviously having never been in labour I make it up - one twisted, screwed up labour... the whole time my 'conscious' was bracing itself for the pain, that thankfully never came!
It's a boy!
Unnamed, we take our bundle of joy home. Well not to our home, the 'home' we have in this nightmare. In our 17 bedroomed mansion [I wish!] there isn't room for a Nursery so the baby sleeps downstairs, in the office, in a proper bed, which has been put on top of the desk!
A good nights sleep
I sleep like a baby, pun intended, and totally forget about my brand new off spring downstairs all night, as does my comatose hubby. Morning comes and I hear the baby roars, spring from the bed, head downstairs, roaring baby soaked.
There is not a nappy in sight!
Hand child to husband and go in search of nappies. Husband puts child on garden table. Baby falls off, bounces [yes my baby bounces] queue appearance of my mother.
'You're an awful mother, I can't believe you put your baby on the garden table and haven't changed or fed him!' [Both husband and mother then disappear!]
'You're an awful mother, I can't believe you put your baby on the garden table and haven't changed or fed him!' [Both husband and mother then disappear!]
The ambulance is here
[as occurs from thin air in dreams]
[as occurs from thin air in dreams]
In the form of my friend's little red peugeot, filled with all my friends from the SATC2 outing! We head to the hospital deciding on the way to call into my [dead] granddad's house for a cup of tea and a wee.
We take a wrong turn
And end up in a part of town we do not know and get lost. Urgency for hospital, thirst for tea and need to wee all gone.
Queue Packie Bonner
Who gives us directions and asks us to play football. WHY NOT?? Materialise football field and teams. Fight over cheer leading pom poms
Probably just as well considering the mothering skills I displayed! Ps am free for any babysitting jobs! Enquire within.
FYI the baby disappeared
Probably just as well considering the mothering skills I displayed! Ps am free for any babysitting jobs! Enquire within.
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